Where to begin… So I couldn’t help but be sad about the situation with trans guy, the way we had drifted apart after dating for a little bit, and seeming to enjoy one another’s company. So I messaged him to say it is totally cool if he had gone off me, but that I thought he was just lovely, and would love to hang out as friends sometime.
It turns out that I had unwittingly scared him off by wanting to have sex with him, and something about that he was in the police station, and it was a long story… so I don’t know what that’s about.
I said that I care about him very much and just hope that he is ok.
And we have started talking again. I’m more than happy to take things slowly or even just stay friends if that’s what he wants. And I’m glad I asked rather than just letting it drop.
I know he has done drugs in the past, ecstasy, cocaine. But he tells me he is over that now.
What I think is most interesting, and upsetting really, is that since I’ve told my friends and family about how things didn’t work out… most of them were immensely relieved. Some of them have said some quite hurtful things, and they don’t even know him. But it turns out they don’t like the thought of me going out with a trans guy. And that’s just me dating him. Which begs the question, if it’s this difficult for me, how difficult must it be for him.
The most upsetting thing, I find, is the lack of acceptance that he is a man.
I imagine it must feel like people tearing shreds off you everytime they mention something along those lines.
On the other hand, I don’t want to be walked over, I saw he had been flirting with someone else, I don’t know what the situation is with that, I haven’t asked.
Anyway, I still care about him, I can’t help it. And now it seems I’m back to my usual role of being the one who does the chasing. Sort of.
So being dumped part 3 is perhaps that… well, perhaps I’m not quite as dumped as I thought I was.