[The transcripts of two favourite scenes (and a song) from the X-files episode ‘all things.’ Written and directed by the very talented Gillian Anderson.]
[or… instead of reading this blog post, you could just watch the episode. Meh.]
(Early morning. Rhythmic dripping sound. SCULLY is getting dressed in a bathroom. A ceiling fan spins slowly above her. She pulls down her green t-shirt, then zips up her black skirt. The old faucet drips rhythmically as she looks at herself in the mirror, fixes her hair, then walks into the other room, a bedroom.)
SCULLY: (voiceover) Time passes in moments … moments which, rushing past define the path of a life just as surely as they lead towards its end. How rarely do we stop to examine that path, to see the reasons why all things happen, to consider whether the path we take in life is our own making or simply one into which we drift with eyes closed.
(She picks up her black jacket and puts it on. She looks thoughtfully at the figure in the bed for a moment, then walks quietly out of the room.)
SCULLY: (voiceover) But what if we could stop, pause to take stock of each precious moment before it passes? Might we then see the endless forks in the road that have shaped a life? And, seeing those choices, choose another path?
(The camera pans across the bed. We see a man’s naked foot and leg lying tangled among the blue sheets and beige comforter. Moving up, we see his bare arms and chest and peacefully sleeping face. It is MULDER.)
(Next day. Raining. SCULLY arrives at COLLEEN AZAR’s house and rings the buzzer. A woman, CAROL, answers.)
CAROL: Hi, can I help you?
SCULLY: Uh, I’m looking for Colleen.
CAROL: You want to come in?
SCULLY: I just need to speak with her that’s all.
(CAROL steps aside so SCULLY can enter. The house is tastefully decorated with lots of Eastern influences. SCULLY, awed, admires the simplicity of the furnishings. A small chime is ringing, slow motion. The moment is broken when CAROL and COLLEEN enter the foyer.)
CAROL: I have to go. Call me if anything interesting happens.
COLLEEN AZAR: Okay. Bye.
(The two women kiss on the lips and CAROL leaves. SCULLY looks away, then COLLEEN AZAR approaches her.)
COLLEEN AZAR: I’m surprised to see you again.
SCULLY: I’m sorry that I was rude before. I’m a medical doctor and a scientist and, you’re right, I don’t know what it is that you do … but there was something that you said that I wanted to ask you about.
COLLEEN AZAR: About slowing down? Would you like to sit down? Please.
(SCULLY joins her on the couch. A small fountain is on the coffee table.)
SCULLY: I have a friend who’s ill, and, um… I had a strange feeling today– just a short while ago, actually– that he may be dying from a more serious condition than anyone realizes.
COLLEEN AZAR: You sense something? Holistic practitioners believe, as do many eastern religions, that living beings exist beyond the physical dimensions of time and space that we’re composed of layers of energy and consciousness. You’ve probably heard it referred to as an “aura.”
(Oh boy, has she.)
SCULLY: Hmm… Yes.
COLLEEN AZAR: Witness this energy field and truths come out that have little to do with scientific proof and much to do with faith.
SCULLY: What are you saying that I saw?
COLLEEN AZAR: Pain. And where there’s pain there’s a need for healing– physically, mentally or spiritually.
SCULLY: But he has a heart condition.
COLLEEN AZAR: When we hold onto shame and guilt and fear it creates imbalance, makes us forget who we are.
COLLEEN AZAR: This is difficult for you to accept.
(COLLEEN AZAR gently places her hand on SCULLY’s leg. In the background, we hear a tea kettle whistling.)
COLLEEN AZAR: (brightly) Would you like to have some tea?
(Later, COLLEEN AZAR is pouring tea for them. SCULLY is contemplating a piece of hanging sculpture.)
COLLEEN AZAR: Have you ever had moments when everything gets incredibly clear? When time seems to expand?
SCULLY: Yes. It’s so strange.
COLLEEN AZAR: You may be more open to things than you think. It’s just a matter of what you do with it.
(She hands SCULLY her cup of tea as SCULLY reflects on her words. COLLEEN takes her cup and leans against the kitchen sink.)
COLLEEN AZAR: I used to be a physicist. I was successful in my field working 80-odd hours a week. I thought I was happy. Truth is, I was cut off from the world and from myself. I was literally dying inside. I was in a relationship with Carol, who you met but I was so afraid of what the world and my family and my fellow scientists would think that I told no one. Then, two years ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
(SCULLY is very sympathetic.)
SCULLY: I’m sorry.
COLLEEN AZAR: (she takes a sip of tea) Mmm… Don’t be. It’s the cancer that got my attention. It stopped me from being on the self-destructive path I was on. It made me realize I was in a field that had little meaning for me and it’s what’s allowed me to be happy for what feels like the first time in my life.
SCULLY: But how?
COLLEEN AZAR: I was introduced to a healer who helped me see the disease for what it was. It wasn’t until I began releasing shame and telling the truth that my cancer went into remission.
(SCULLY looks down.)
COLLEEN AZAR: You still aren’t sure. You came here looking for answers and you want something to take back with you. Everything happens for a reason.
(SCULLY looks at her.)
MULDER: I don’t think you can know. I mean, how many different lives would we be leading if we made different choices. We… we don’t know.
SCULLY: What if there was only one choice and all the other ones were wrong? And there were signs along the way to pay attention to.
MULDER: Mmm. And all the… choices would then lead to this very moment. One wrong turn, and… we wouldn’t be sitting here together. Well, that says a lot. That says a lot, a lot, a lot. That’s probably more than we should be getting into at this late hour.