With you it’s always take, take and no give.

I love how sinister this song is. I know where you live.

Placebo – I.K.W.Y.L.

I’m not really into politics. This whole Maggie Thatcher dying thing. Well it’s big news. I mean, I’m from a Welsh mining town. I was but a child, but feelings, they run deep. We are under the control again, of a Conservative government, despite the fact that practically no-one in Wales or Scotland or the English cities voted for them. It seems so wrong, on so many levels. We’re not alive for long. And to have to live your life under such authority, and carelessness, it stinks.

Anyway. I’m not sure who taught it to us, but even as a child… not knowing much in the world, we knew we weren’t supposed to like Maggie Thatcher.

“Maggie Thatcher chuck her in a bin, put a lid on and cellotape her in. If she jumps out, smash her on the head, poor Maggie Thatcher she’s certainly dead.”

I have a surprising number of Conservative friends, who are surprisingly down-to-earth, ‘normal’, lovely people. (I couldn’t think of an alternative word to surprising so you have it twice.) I’m forever perplexed at how they came to that decision. Though I’m sure it’s more to do with the areas they are from originally. Yes, the English countryside. They were probably taught rather different playground songs in school.

I’m not taking any moral high-ground. Hell if I were a stinking rich landowner and voting Tory would save me so much in tax, and wouldn’t affect me directly…

People generally lack compassion for others. We’re all out for ourselves ultimately. I don’t suppose I am any different.

Maybe I would be, I don’t know.

All I know is it’s a bad time to be jobless and on benefits. And I never expected it would be this difficult to get a job. Even as a cleaner. There are no jobs. Wouldn’t it be better if instead of randomly picking 1 out of the 100 CVs and offering them a job, it was weighted slightly in favour of the person who has been out of work the longest? Or is that a stupid idea?

It all went downhill when Tesco’s implemented self-servive checkouts I tell you. There’s a Freudian typo if ever I saw one. I’m going to leave it. I meant to say self-service of course.

But my confidence, well, it’s been crushed. Perhaps it oozes out of me and my applications. Perhaps I radiate depression and hopelessness.

Perhaps I have no enthusiasm. Perhaps I secretly resent having to apply for shitty jobs I don’t want. Perhaps it’s fucking counter-productive to make you apply for 10 jobs a week instead of say, 1 job a week that you actually really, really want to get.

Perhaps I’m fed up of getting my hopes up and having them dashed at the last hurdle.

Or perhaps I’m just a lazy waste of space and somebody should just get rid.

I’m not the only one that feels this way, I guarantee it.

Or perhaps, before topping myself, I should just go self-employed again. Prostitution has always looked appealing to me. (Half-joke.)

Apart from anything I just feel like I’m letting everyone down, especially myself.

Anyway, I’m just going to go and wallow in something. Some mud or something. Maybe a cesspool.

I don’t feel like being very proactive today.

11 thoughts on “With you it’s always take, take and no give.

  1. Well I love Placebo….like you. And do you know, I basically strapped my fingers to each other to stop myself writing about Margaret Thatcher. I did reply to someone else a few days ago. He had a post about how great she and Reagan were, and what good people they were. Maybe Reagan was, I do not know. Anyway, my reply was that I thought Margaret Thatcher was a horrible person. I do not care whether she is alive or dead. And listening to those douchebags in the UK parliament (and one arsehold out here as well) going on about how good she was just makes me puke. When I think of people that I consider fine and good in the world, when i think even of its future and its promise, I think of people like you, not people like her.

    And I felt some sorrow in reading your post…how this new way of life makes you feel. There are not enough jobs, sure, but it is not your fault if you cannot land a decent one. I know you have graduated….it may be worth adding something on to what you have already done – and in a field where you can do some work related to what you study. You are not lazy, you are lovely.

    And do not let them get at you…..*hugs*

  2. Lady Thatcher was a remarkable woman. In politics? Perhaps not. But she was a woman of iron in a place no women were allowed. Outspoken and shrill she battled and did her best to steer the government the way she thought was right. But every party has a time and a function and that is something she might not have understood. One thing she did understand was determination and character. When the whole Falkland Island mess went down, she sat down and wrote letters to the families of the servicemen who died in the conflict. She was faced with terrorism and she saw her best friends blown all to hell by car bombs right in front of her yet she still stayed in government.

    Now, being working class I can assure you that her policies did not often sit well with me. She was a staunch supporter of “do or die” which is an easy mindset to fall into if you are determined, even if it doesn’t work. But all in all, the woman was remarkable. As a politician, maybe. As a woman, without question. The same with Reagan, although that bank deregulation and handing the keys to the kingdom to big businesses almost brought the entire country and global economy to it’s knees. He wasn’t a bad person, just someone who did the best they could.

    Now as for you, take this time to be still and to work on you. When the time is right, everything will fall into place. But when it falls, you have to be ready and willing to respond with everything you have. I know you are going to want to strangle me through the computer, but in all seriousness… use this time to focus on things you won’t be able to focus on when you get a job. That way you’ll be ready and prepared. I’m praying that you find something soon, something that will be the right fit for you. I’m here too if you want to voice more frustration, and do forgive me for my history nerd moment. 🙂

    • I do want to strangle you a little. But more for your praise of Thatcher lol. She also helped to invent Mr Whippy ice-cream… but none of the positives in my opinion come anywhere near to making up for the negatives.

      1. She supported the retention of capital punishment
      2. She destroyed the country’s manufacturing industry
      3. She voted against the relaxation of divorce laws
      4. She abolished free milk for schoolchildren (“Margaret Thatcher, Milk Snatcher”)
      5. She supported more freedom for business (and look how that turned out)
      6. She gained support from the National Front in the 1979 election by pandering to the fears of immigration
      7. She gerrymandered local authorities by forcing through council house sales, at the same time preventing councils from spending the money they got for selling houses on building new houses (spending on social housing dropped by 67% in her premiership)
      8. She was responsible for 3.6 million unemployed – the highest figure and the highest proportion of the workforce in history and three times the previous government. Massaging of the figures means that the figure was closer to 5 million
      9. She ignored intelligence about Argentinian preparations for the invasion of the Falkland Islands and scrapped the only Royal Navy presence in the islands
      10. The poll tax
      11. She presided over the closure of 150 coal mines; we are now crippled by the cost of energy, having to import expensive coal from abroad
      12. She compared her “fight” against the miners to the Falklands War
      13. She privatised state monopolies and created the corporate greed culture that we’ve been railing against for the last 5 years
      14. She introduced the gradual privatisation of the NHS
      15. She introduced financial deregulation in a way that turned city institutions into avaricious money pits
      16. She pioneered the unfailing adoration and unquestioning support of the USA
      17. She allowed the US to place nuclear missiles on UK soil, under US control
      18. Section 28
      19. She opposed anti-apartheid sanctions against South Africa and described Nelson Mandela as “that grubby little terrorist”
      20. She support the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia and sent the SAS to train their soldiers
      21. She allowed the US to bomb Libya in 1986, against the wishes of more than 2/3 of the population
      22. She opposed the reunification of Germany
      23. She invented Quangos
      24. She increased VAT from 8% to 17.5%
      25. She had the lowest approval rating of any post-war Prime Minister
      26. Her post-PM job? Consultant to Philip Morris tobacco at $250,000 a year, plus $50,000 per speech
      27. The Al Yamamah contract
      28. She opposed the indictment of Chile’s General Pinochet
      29. Social unrest under her leadership was higher than at any time since the General Strike
      30. She presided over interest rates increasing to 15%
      31. BSE
      32. She presided over 2 million manufacturing job losses in the 79-81 recession
      33. She opposed the inclusion of Eire in the Northern Ireland peace process
      34. She supported sanctions-busting arms deals with South Africa
      35. Cecil Parkinson, Alan Clark, David Mellor, Jeffrey Archer, Jonathan Aitkin
      36. Crime rates doubled under Thatcher
      37. Black Wednesday – Britain withdraws from the ERM and the pound is devalued. Cost to Britain – £3.5 billion; profit for George Soros – £1 billion
      38. Poverty doubled while she opposed a minimum wage
      39. She privatised public services, claiming at the time it would increase public ownership. Most are now owned either by foreign governments (EDF) or major investment houses. The profits don’t now accrue to the taxpayer, but to foreign or institutional shareholders.
      40. She cut 75% of funding to museums, galleries and other sources of education
      41. In the Thatcher years the top 10% of earners received almost 50% of the tax remissions
      42. 21.9% inflation.

      And I love your history nerd moments btw so all is good. I’ll be honest I know nothing about Reagan, except that he was the president was he? lol.

      And thanks for your good thoughts about job thoughts, you’re right, it’s not all bad. Just… frustrating.

      • Holy shit. This comment just kept going… and going. Damn girl, you sure you weren’t hiding out with the manuscripts in college?

        And yeah. Damn.

        Okay, I withdraw.

        And Reagan was her BFF. He is idolized by everyone who watches Fox News. Ergh.

        But the movie made about her was cool. 😀

        • Oh I didn’t compose the list. I’m not that knowledgeable lol. Just trying to ensure we have a more balanced representation of the lady in question 🙂

          (I copied and pasted it off facebook) 😉

  3. I saw the movie n I was impressed. Read your blog n I was depressed.. Never have I wrote about matters on politics for personal reasons but
    Thatcher”s death n the ensuing reactions are just confirmation that politics have no relation to morals!
    And definitely don’t think you r a lazy waste of space . For what’s its worth You write interesting blogs , n your pics r wonderfully provoking! I know of people who make a living off blogging with sponsorships etc. . Btw when I graduated , things were so bad that I took 6 months to get a job! And that was via my uncle’s recommendation!! So b kind to yourself n I agree with John – things will fall in place soon , life is such😊

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